GOD ALMIGHTY. I was up until nearly 5 a.m. on a top-secret mission, so only now am I starting to clear my head and take in the latest coverage. To begin, two good pieces on the missing link at the Republican National Convention: the religious right.

The New York Times' David Kirkpatrick proved how evil and nefarious the liberal-media conspiracy really is by - gasp! - worming his way inside a gathering of Bible-thumpers and telling the truth about what he heard. His lead:

At a closed, invitation-only Bush campaign rally for Christian conservatives yesterday, Senator Sam Brownback of Kansas called for a broad social conservative agenda notably different from the televised presentations at the Republican convention, including adopting requirements that pregnant women considering abortions be offered anesthetics for their fetuses and loosening requirements on the separation of church and state.

Kirkpatrick was able to attend this "Family, Faith, and Freedom Rally," even though it was closed to the press, because he "was invited to the event by participants who accompanied him." Did that amount to subterfuge? Kirkpatrick doesn't really tell us enough to judge. He does write that "in an e-mail message to The New York Times, Nicolle Devenish, the campaign's communications director, criticized the newspaper for covering an event that 'was closed to the press' as 'not professional or appropriate.'"

It certainly seems to me that what he found was newsworthy enough to warrant sneaking in, as long as he didn't actually misrepresent himself. Read it for yourself and see.

Meanwhile, the Boston Globe's Charlie Savage finds that at least some of the Godly are upset at all those moderates being trotted out at the podium every night. Savage writes:

Since the convention began Monday, they say they have not only been kept from the spotlight of prime-time speaking spots, but have been offered few official outlets at all. The lineup of meetings where delegates spend the day before the nightly rallies have offered scant forum to those who want to discuss faith and politics.

Savage also observes that Karl Rove has made a fetish out of trying to motivate the four million evangelicals who supposedly stayed home in 2000. To that end, he quotes a religious-right figure named Rod McDougal as saying, "I think they're making a mistake. We didn't realize they were going to eliminate and censor everything about God.... They need some people of faith up there."

Gee, I didn't realize that John McCain, Rudy Giuliani, Arnold Schwarzenegger, and Laura Bush were atheists. Shows you what I know!

ALL THEY WANT IS A PLANE AND A MILLION DOLLARS. The lying Swifties, having taken John Kerry's presidential campaign hostage, are now making demands that Kerry must meet in order for them to call off their sleazy ad campaign. It's a four-point list, but it basically comes down to one thing: Admit you're a lying, disgraceful, worthless human being and we'll go away.

Why are these people still hanging around, many days after virtually every single one of their claims has been shown to be bogus? Here's some more Somerby. Read it and scream.

NEVER COMPLAIN, NEVER EXPLAIN. House Speaker Dennis Hastert refuses to apologize for linking George Soros to the international drug cartels.

ROMNEY FOR PRESIDENT? Don't laugh. Well, okay, laugh. The Globe's Sarah Schweitzer reports on our absentee governor's New York moment here. Newsweek's got a picture of him on a goddamn horse, which, sadly, is not online, though the story is.

Meanwhile, the Herald's David Guarino reports that Romney wouldn't exactly have much of a record on which to run.

CONTINUING COVERAGE. While I'm holed up here at Media Log Central, my Phoenix colleagues are running around New York, uploading constantly. Click here for the Phoenix's continuing coverage of the convention.