Eat the document. With the House of Representatives changing the name of French fries to Freedom fries, George W. Bush is starting to look awfully passive, don't you think? Where is the bold leadership that he showed at his news conference last week, when he droned about a dozen times that we need to invade Iraq because of 9/11? Why, you'd think Iraq had something to do with 9/11, which I guess was the point.

Anyway, I suggest that the president one-up the House by referring to turkey as constitution in order to signal our displeasure with Turkey, which continues to believe it's a sovereign state or something. Think of how proud we'll all be next Thanksgiving, when Bush carves up the constitution and then eats it. Let French -- er, freedom -- ring.